The Barefoot Barmaid (Belles & Bullets Book 1) Page 5

  “Good morning to you too.” And with that, he threw Kitt's brassiere over the side of the ship with the rest of her clothes. The captain's spectators roared with laughter as her clothes fluttered through the sky.

  “Why did you do that?” she squealed. “Those were my only clothes!”

  “I did it because those clothes were unsightly, yet you insisted on wearing them every day. Now you have no choice but to wear the gowns I have provided for you, and when you go to meet the queen, you won't look like a godforsaken--”

  “I hate you!” Kitt almost spat in his face, but a part of her still feared him, and what he might do in retaliation. And she couldn't ignore the fact that she just woke up in his bed. As much as it made her queasy to think of it, he probably had his paws all over her.

  “Thank you, my dear. That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Truly.” Doon turned his back on her, and as he walked away, the other pirates cackled and clapped him on the shoulder, as if disposing of a young woman's clothing was something to celebrate. The captain and his pirates sat in a semi-circle on the deck, not too far away, but far enough to send the message that she was not a part of their group. The smirk stayed on Doon's lips as he removed his gun from its holster to polish it. Though he conversed with his crewmates, he kept his eyes on Kitt, and she kept her eyes on him. She wished it was possible to glare at a person long enough to make their head spontaneously combust.

  Suddenly, a voice spoke from behind. “My lady?”

  Kitt recognized Miles' voice immediately. When she spun around, she was surprised by how relieved she was to see him. A friendly face on Doon's ship was a welcome rarity. “Miles!” she practically whimpered his name. “Miles, did you see what happened?”

  “Alas... I did. It was unfortunate that it had to come to that.”

  “It didn't have to come to that!” Kitt shrieked. “It never had to come to that! They might have been boyish, but I liked those clothes! And if he had any shred of decency in him, he would never have laughed at my undergarments and tossed them overboard!”

  “You put him in a difficult position, my lady. As captain, he must make a show of authority, and the fact that you constantly challenged him--”

  “You're taking up for him?”

  “No, no, not at all, dear, not at all.” Miles laid a hand on Kitt's back and attempted to steer her away from the deck. “Now... I must remind you that you would be safer in your room.”

  “Yeah. My room,” Kitt repeated the words with a sigh. “Did you know I woke up in the captain's bed this morning?”

  “Indeed? Oh my.”

  Miles' lack of reaction was frustrating to her. She thought he was trying to be her friend, but at the moment, he was making a rather poor attempt. “I have no idea what happened last night, but I can only imagine.”

  “Miss Kitt, would you care for some tea?” Miles suggested when they arrived at her bedroom door. “I would be more than happy to prepare some for you. It might settle your nerves. And if it pleases you, I could join you for a game of cards. When I'm feeling blue-deviled, I find there is nothing more pleasantly distracting than a friendly game or two.”

  “Hmm...” Kitt's thoughts were occupied elsewhere, so it took her a moment to answer his question. “I'd rather not have any tea, but we can play a game of cards, if you'd like.”

  “Very good!” Miles sat at the small table in the center of the room and pulled a deck of cards from the pocket of his greatcoat. Kitt was surprised to see the cards already in his hand. It was as if he had been anticipating playing cards with her for some time. With a smile as wide as his face, he cut the deck in half and proceeded to shuffle them.

  Kitt sat across from him, but her mind was still fixated on Doon. “You claim the captain is a decent man, but I don't think so. I think he's an arrogant prig and a... pardon my language... a bastard. He is vile and uncaring and unwilling to see the truth!”

  “I am very sorry you feel that way,” Miles said as he continued to shuffle.

  “I woke up in his bed. In his bed!” Her voice went sharp as she repeated the words. “One might argue that I had quite a bit to drink, and that I passed out on my own, but I wouldn't be surprised if he drugged me!”

  “Oh, I highly doubt that.” Even though he disagreed, the smile remained on Miles' cheerful face.

  “Why? Why would it surprise you? Why do you have such unwavering confidence in a man who has no qualms about kidnapping young women, locking them up, and forcing them to do things against their will?” Kitt dragged a hand through her short red hair. Miles seemed like a sensible man—so why couldn't he relate to her? “Why is it so outlandish to think he might have taken advantage of me... o-or forced himself on me?”

  “Because...” Miles sighed deeply. He pulled his monocle from his pocket and held it to his eye. He wanted to see her reaction as clearly as possible when he told her the truth. “Because, my lady, our young captain is a virgin.”

  8

  “You're fooling me, right?” Kitt chuckled at the ludicrous secret that Miles had supposedly disclosed. “Captain Doon... a virgin? There is absolutely no way you're serious.”

  But Miles' face was painfully serious, and he did not strike her as the type to make idle jests. A wisp of a smile drifted across his lips as he continued to shuffle the cards. “My lady, I would not lie about something like this.”

  “H-how is that possible, though?” Kitt's mind continued to reject the idea. “It goes against everything that makes sense. He's a pirate... he has this swagger... this... this sort of arrogant air about him. I assumed he was a lady's man, if anything. I assumed he was the type of man who had a lady at every port he visited. He looks like a rake and a rogue!”

  Miles started to deal the cards as he spoke. “That couldn't be further from the truth.”

  “But are you sure?” Kitt just stared at the pile of cards in front of her, her mouth gaping. “Has he told you he's a virgin?”

  “Absolutely.” Miles sat back and crossed his arms. “That captain's had a... a somewhat difficult life.”

  “How so?” Kitt was desperate for any shred of information to make sense of what Miles was telling her.

  Her companion was quiet for some time. His eyes were intent as he scratched his bristly white beard. Kitt assumed he was struggling to decide how much he wanted to share with her. He was revealing secrets that were not his own, so in a way, she could understand his reluctance. “It was something to do with his father... and a very long history of abuse. But I shall say no more. If you want to know the details, you will have to get the story straight from the captain's own lips.”

  “Yeah, but I doubt he'd ever tell me anything.” Kitt held her cards in front of her face, but she was distracted. She saw a pair of queens in her hand, but all she could do was stare through them. “Do all of Doon's crewmates know the story?”

  “Are you thinking to squeeze the story out of one of them?” Miles asked with a chuckle. “The answer is no. The captain is very careful about who he shares information with, and I believe there are elements of the story that embarrass him... which is why I have opted to withhold the rest of the details.”

  Even though she was disappointed, Kitt accepted defeat. “I... understand.”

  However, when their card game was underway, Miles decided to share another tantalizing detail with her. “Actually, the captain has a strong aversion to affection of any kind. He doesn't like being touched.”

  “You mean... he doesn't like being hugged?”

  “Indeed. But it's more than that. Even the slightest touch of skin on skin is enough to set him off,” Miles explained. “He recoils from it.”

  “I... wow.” Kitt had no idea what to say. The day was getting stranger and stranger. It was odd enough to think of the captain as a virgin—but it wasn't so outlandish, as Kitt was a virgin herself. But to hate being touched? She wanted to test what Miles was saying, but that would mean spending time with Doon, and he wasn't exactly her favorite person i
n the world. “I never would have expected any of this. You've really shattered my mind today, Miles.”

  “I'm not surprised. It would be easy to assume the captain has a long history with women, just from the way he is. But that couldn't be further from the truth.”

  “What about your history with women?” Kitt suddenly asked. As fascinated as she was by his unexpected chastity, she was done talking about Francis Doon. “Is there a Mrs. Miles waiting for you somewhere?”

  “I'm afraid not.” Miles' answer was accompanied by such an impressive sigh, Kitt wondered if she had asked the wrong question. “There was a Mrs. Miles, but she ran away from me ages ago.”

  Kitt's gaze dropped to the cards in her hand. “Oh. I'm sorry to hear that.”

  “I was a young man when she left me. And truth be told, I could have been a better husband. When I was with her, I was a very different man than I am today.”

  “You seem like such a gentleman,” Kitt said. “That wasn't always the case?”

  “No. I was... cruel. I wish I could tell you more, but my heart aches to think of it.” Miles swiped a finger under his eye, crushing an oncoming tear. “I could have been a better father too.”

  “You have a child?”

  “Yes. Although it seems odd to call her a child now.” Miles' frown intensified as he was forced to remember his unpleasant past. “If she was alive today, she would be older than you, my lady. Quite a bit older, in fact.”

  “If she was alive...” Kitt whispered the words. She did not want to press him for more information; however, because she could see the sorrow in Miles' quivering lips.

  “Wisdom often comes later in life, when it's already too late. For that reason, a man should never be held accountable for the sins of his past.”

  After that, Miles had little else to say. They played a few card games in near-silence, during which Kitt's mind kept wandering back to Doon. She had so many doubts and so many questions. In a way, she couldn't wait until they got to the castle, to free herself from Doon. She couldn't wait to stop thinking about it, and about him.

  And then it dawned on her.

  “When we get to the castle... I guess... I won't see any of you anymore?” Kitt tried not to sound too melancholy about it. After all, she was taken against her will. Even so, she had developed a soft spot for Miles.

  “I would suppose not, my lady.”

  “I'm not sure what to expect when I arrive. Will they think I'm a princess? Or will they realize I'm an impostor and lop my head off, even though this impersonation was never my idea?”

  “I honestly cannot say. I suppose it could go either way.”

  “Great. That's... great.” Kitt lowered her head to the table and sighed. If nothing else, at least Miles believed her when she said she wasn't the princess. In fact, he never doubted her, and she appreciated him for that. “I guess I should probably prepare myself for the worst, because I don't--”

  A sudden knock on the door interrupted Kitt's thought, and Captain Doon entered her room before she had a chance to welcome him in.

  He leaned against the door frame as he greeted them. “Good afternoon. It's lovely to see you again, Princess. I assume you find me just as intolerable as ever?”

  “What tipped you off?” Kitt snidely replied. “Was it my sneer, my groan, or the disgusted scowl that magically appears on my face every time I'm forced to share oxygen with you?”

  “Probably the oxygen thing.” Doon yawned loud and long, as if to show how little he cared about her opinion of him. “It's lovely to see you've found a friend in Miles. I guess someone had to like you sooner or later. Unlike me, Miles has a high tolerance for bratty young women.”

  “Mm. Yes.” Kitt slapped her cards on the table and turned in Doon's direction. “It's so nice to finally find someone on this airship who doesn't want to rape me or steal my belongings.”

  “Ah. You're still bitter that I tossed your clothes overboard, I see.”

  “Did you really expect me to not be bitter about that?”

  Miles shook his head and sighed. He'd heard enough of their bickering, and now he was ready to take his leave. He silently rose from his chair and went to the door.

  “Miles!” Kitt exclaimed. “Miles, don't leave me alone with him!”

  “I will return shortly, my lady,” Miles promised as he exited the room. “I have some errands I must attend to.”

  “Miles!” Kitt tried to call to him again, to beg him to stay, but he was already gone. “Dammit.”

  “Such unladylike language! How very unbecoming of a princess.”

  “Oh, please. You know I'm not a princess, right? You've figured it out? Because if you haven't, you're even more dense than I expected.”

  “Actually, I probably am as dense as you'd expect. Lack of education and all that. You should feel sorry for me. I'm just a poor, dumb pirate.” Doon watched her rise from her chair and stomp to her bed. He thought she looked like a petulant child, but he had already teased her enough for one day. He had actually hoped to make peace with her, not goad her further. “Listen, Princess--”

  “Kitt,” she corrected him.

  “Oh, if you insist.” Doon crossed his arms and paced around the room. “As it happens, I've come with a peace offering.” Before she could ask him what he meant, he sprinted into the hall and returned with something she did not expect.

  “A dog?”

  “Yes. A dog. Is that really so shocking?” As soon as Doon placed him on the ground, the animal ran to Kitt so fast, it was as if he had been waiting for her his entire life. As the dog approached, Kitt noticed something unusual. There was a loud metallic clang every time his paw hit the floor. And when he sat on the ground by her feet, she heard the unmistakable soft hiss of a steam engine. “What on earth...?”

  “I assume you've noticed the leg?” Doon asked. “Barnabus has a mechanical leg, but it functions just like any normal appendage, I assure you.”

  “I barely even noticed.” Kitt picked up Barnabus and held him on her lap. Upon closer observation of his leg, she could see the metal hidden beneath his paw. His synthetic leg had been covered in fur, making it look almost real. “And it lets him move around just like any normal dog?”

  “Almost. The knee locks up from time to time.”

  “This is... unlike anything I've ever seen before. How did you come across such a thing?”

  “The dog or the leg?”

  Kitt gave him a strange look, as if she couldn't believe the captain didn't understand what she meant. “Both!”

  “I rescued the dog a little over a year ago. His leg was barely attached when I found him. He looked like he'd been brutalized, possibly by a knife. I always assumed his wound was the result of human cruelty.”

  Kitt hoisted the dog to her face, and when she did, the small brown terrier attempted to lick her nose. But she held him far enough away so that the tongue didn't quite reach her. “He's adorable. Who could do such a thing to an adorable, small animal?”

  “I have no idea. There are a lot of barbarians in the world we live in.”

  “Barbarians like you,” Kitt added with a snort.

  “No, not like me. I'd never hurt an animal.”

  “Oh, but you would hurt women and children. Or are you going to deny that too?”

  “I've never denied that.” Doon sat in a stool in the corner of the room and watched her pet the dog. There was slight smile on his lips, but his expression wasn't entirely pleasant. “As I said, some rumors are good for my reputation.”

  “You poor doggy,” Kitt whispered to Barnabus. “You had to be with the captain for a year, but don't worry. I'll take good care of you now.”

  Doon ignored her subtle insult and spoke again. “You were wondering about the leg, were you not? After Barnabus' mangled leg was removed, I sought help from a renowned engineer. It wasn't cheap, but he did not disappoint. In a few days, he was able to craft the mechanical leg you see today.”

  “You went to such lengths to h
elp a dog? I don't know why, but that surprises me.” Captain Doon was surprising her in many ways today. She was beginning to feel as if she knew nothing about him.

  “I have something in common with Barnabus.” The captain started to tug on one of his leather gloves. “But he was rather more unlucky than I was.”

  When Doon's glove was off, he surprised her yet again. Two fingers on his left hand—his pinkie and the one beside it—were missing, replaced by metallic parts.

  “You... lost your fingers?”

  “Only two, fortunately,” Doon answered with a chuckle. “Unlike Barnabus' leg, my metal fingers are actually quite useless. They don't move or bend or function. They're just decoration.” Soon after revealing his hand, he pulled the glove back on. “I don't show my hand to many people. Consider yourself lucky.”

  “I...” Kitt hesitated. She wanted to come back with snarky retort, but she couldn't bring herself to do it—not now. She felt sorry for him. “Miles mentioned your unfortunate past with your father. Did you lose your fingers because of him?”

  “Ah, Miles! He's as loose-lipped as ever, I see.” The captain's eyes rolled in the direction of the ceiling. “That man needs to mind his own business. And he needs to stop sharing my business with whom it was never meant to be shared!”

  “Don't be angry with Miles.”

  “I'm not angry with him. I'm.... frustrated.”

  “Was I correct?” Kitt leaned forward in her chair, awaiting his answer with bated breath. “How did you lose them? Did your father have something to do with it?”

  “You already know too much. I'm not going to utter another word on the matter!” Uncomfortable with the conversation, Doon decided it was time to go. Before he passed through the doorway, he paused. “I will say, however, that you made a very good guess.”

  9

  When Kitt realized it was her last day on the airship, her heart felt strangely heavy. It wasn't that she particularly liked being taken against her will, but there were elements of the adventure that were undeniably enjoyable. She enjoyed standing on the deck of the airship as it carved through the clouds. She enjoyed tea with Miles in the morning, and she didn't even mind squabbling with the captain. That was perhaps the strangest part of all. Deep in her heart, she felt a bizarre satisfaction every time they bickered.